MDPC/3EH #16 [TurnAround Thursday] Children Teach Us?!

Hey there Difference Maker!

Today’s TurnAround is … Children Teach Us What We Need To Know

In our quest to correct undesirable behaviors, we often overlook the power of love, positive regard and life-affirmative attention. Research has consistently shown that withholding these essential elements only perpetuates self-absorbed behaviors.

But how do we strike the right balance? How do we know when we are giving enough energetically connecting attention or when it becomes excessive?

The answer lies in the behaviors exhibited by our children. They are the true teachers, offering us valuable insights into their needs, emotions and resistance to the energetic vibes coming in at them.

Instead of reacting forcefully, fearfully or shamefully, we must learn to be non-resistant and compassionately curious about the messages behind their attention – connection – seeking behaviors.

The more we resist, the more these behaviors will persist … and intensify.

The message is simple yet powerful:  When children lack welcoming energetic emotional connection they crave, their anxiety manifests in attention getting -connection seeking – behaviors.

We have complicated a straightforward concept with over-analysis.

To truly make a difference in the lives of today’s children, it is crucial that we learn to embrace these behaviors as opportunities – instead of de-energizing challenges – in seeing and then course correcting the energetic connections happening whether we mean for them to be happening or not.

Children Teach Us What We Need To Know
-Mary Reynolds

FOR THE FUN OF IT: You may have heard of the “Say What You See” strategy.  I think it’s a good strategy UNLESS you have a child having a meltdown, and your default adulting is set at “this is bratty behavior” and then you say to the child, “I see you are being a brat, now knock it off” … well, I think you know what happens next.

So this week, to counteract default adulting that’s going to blow things up when you are trying to “Say What You See” think this instead …

“What is this child trying to teach me about what’s really going on?” 

I think it will help you immensely.

You have a child that won’t put on their raincoat.  What is it, that you need to understand about your child’s struggle with the raincoat?

I hear you already.

“I don’t have time to dink around with this nonsense! Get that coat on and let’s go!”

Right?

However, how long does it take to ask yourself, “What is this behavior trying to teach me about what’s really going on?”

Oh yeah, that’s right.  About 30 Seconds!  I’m just sayin’.

I think you’ll be surprised by what you are about to learn.

Reaching out …

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